FIVE SMART-ASS WINNING ANSWERS

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Salvaged from Archive: These posts were salvaged from the web archive of the original FileCabi forum (2007–2008). Usernames are as they were then and aren’t linked to today’s accounts.

Author	Message
firecreature Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 1 Dec 2005, 01:48 · [Salvaged from Archive] FIVE SMART-ASS WINNING ANSWERS The 5 winning smart ass answers of all time: Âha Smart Ass Answer #5: Âha Âha A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Âha Without missing a beat....she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub." Âha Âha Smart Ass Answer #4: Âha Âha A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" Âha Âha The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead." Âha Âha Âha Smar t Ass Answer #3: Âha Âha Âha The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. Âha Âha The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could" Âha Âha When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket. Âha Âha Smart Ass Answer #2: Âha Âha A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" Âha The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas." Âha Âha Âha Âha Âha AND THE #1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF ALL TIME......... Âha Âha Âha Âha A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. Âha Âha "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" Âha Âha A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" Âha Âha The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. Âha Âha When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shaking her head and sweetly said "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."Âha * I didn't fully copy the last Smart Ass Answer, lol for those who noticed the last joke wasent all that funny, i'v edited it*
jedi_soccer Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 1 Dec 2005, 02:40 · [Salvaged from Archive] omg lol hilarious, but i think there could of been some betters ones than the number 1 one
firecreature Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 1 Dec 2005, 02:46 · [Salvaged from Archive] Lol yea but its pretty damn funny when teachers pass comments like that to there students. But i do agree I like the one with the speeding kid best.
Hails Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 1 Dec 2005, 06:24 · [Salvaged from Archive] Hahahahaha , there all classics , but i like number 2 the best :lol: :lol:
sonic 2 Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 1 Dec 2005, 19:40 · [Salvaged from Archive] i like #2 it is byfar the best of thoses but i like them all
jedi_soccer Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 1 Dec 2005, 20:45 · [Salvaged from Archive] AND THE #1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF ALL TIME......... Âha Âha Âha Âha A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. Âha Âha "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" Âha Âha A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" Âha Âha The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. Âha Âha When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shaking her head and sweetly said "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."Âha * I didn't fully copy the last Smart Ass Answer, lol for those who noticed the last joke wasent all that funny, i'v edited it* o man the edited one is SOOOOOOOOO MUCH better than the last one!!! absolutely hilarious
Rocker Kid Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 6 Feb 2006, 09:04 · [Salvaged from Archive] I like them all.
phoenixobert Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 7 Feb 2006, 02:02 · [Salvaged from Archive] sorry to say as funny as they may be this guy got them from hahahahahaha world
heylookitsben Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 26 Feb 2006, 22:01 · [Salvaged from Archive] How is that last one edited? I've seen that exact same thing in an email years ago.
Boudreaux2184 Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 22 May 2006, 13:07 · [Salvaged from Archive] AND THE NUMBER ONE BURN OF THE CENTURY GOES TO *DRUM ROLL PLEASE". . . . . . . .THE TEACHER!!!
Commando80 Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 4 Jul 2006, 22:22 · [Salvaged from Archive] FIVE SMART-ASS WINNING ANSWERS The 5 winning smart ass answers of all time: Âha Smart Ass Answer #5: Âha Âha A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Âha Without missing a beat....she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub." Âha Âha Smart Ass Answer #4: Âha Âha A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" Âha Âha The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead." Âha Âha Âha Smar t Ass Answer #3: Âha Âha Âha The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. Âha Âha The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could" Âha Âha When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket. Âha Âha Smart Ass Answer #2: Âha Âha A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" Âha The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas." Âha Âha Âha Âha Âha AND THE #1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF ALL TIME......... Âha Âha Âha Âha A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. Âha Âha "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" Âha Âha A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" Âha Âha The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. Âha Âha When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shaking her head and sweetly said "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."Âha * I didn't fully copy the last Smart Ass Answer, lol for those who noticed the last joke wasent all that funny, i'v edited it* Taken from hahahahahahahahahahaha.com nice try though lol
babadi Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 5 Jul 2006, 06:28 · [Salvaged from Archive] For #2 "heeeres yer Sign"
chuckey5 Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 20 Jul 2006, 21:36 · [Salvaged from Archive] Funniest for me was number 4.
Thanatos Salvaged from Archive	Posted: 7 Sept 2006, 23:56 · [Salvaged from Archive] YES BABADI! love that guy ;) :lol: I preferred the speeding ticket 1 lol