The Forum › Jokes, Humor and Pranks FileCabi.net Forum (2007–2008)

Funny Quotations

1. SkyDiverSalvaged from archive15 May 2006, 17:23
   Funny Qoute by Stefan Bergman I speak twelve languages. English is the best test. Funny Qoute by Jacques Languirand Men who don't understand women fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands. Funny Qoute by Ken Dodd My act is very educational. I heard a man leaving the other night saying, 'Well that taught me a lesson'. Funny Qoute by Evelyn Waugh Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. Funny Qoute by Woody Allen In Los Angeles they don't throw out their garbage away. They make it into television shows. Funny Qoute by Buddy Hackett My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it. Funny Qoute by Joe Namath Until I was thirteen I thought my name was 'Shutup'. Funny Qoute by Roseanne Barr The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest. Funny Qoute by Rita Rudner Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code...he turned himself in. Funny Qoute by Jilly Cooper The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things.[/b]
2. phoenixobertSalvaged from archive24 May 2006, 03:52
   you do know that Quote is spelled wrong on EVERY one of those right?
3. cheese muffinSalvaged from archive27 Jul 2006, 16:26
   you do know that Quote is spelled wrong on EVERY one of those right?ROFL...... pwnt
4. babadiSalvaged from archive28 Jul 2006, 16:30
   you do know that Quote is spelled wrong on EVERY one of those right? yet he spells quotations right
5. Commando80Salvaged from archive31 Jul 2006, 13:02
   He probably copied and pasted from a site, and the site owner who posted them probably spelled quote wrong.
6. crazyjoeSalvaged from archive3 Aug 2006, 21:21
   "Those who quote themselves are fools"- Unanimous
7. cymru am bythSalvaged from archive4 Oct 2006, 23:34
   "The great thing about Glasgow now is that if there is a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards" - Billy Connolly "Each section of the British Isles has it's own way of laughing, except the Wales, which doesn't" - Stephen Leacock "Of course, America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up" - Oscar Wilde "Apart from cheese and tulips, the main product of Holland is advocaat, a drink made from lawyers." - Alan Coren "To live in Australia permanently is rather like going to a party and dancing all night with your mother" - Barry Humphries "Continental people have a sex life; the English have hot-water bottles." - George Mikes, Hungarian writer, How To Be an Alien, 1946 "The land of my fathers, and my fathers can have it" - Dylan Thomas on his homeland, Wales. "America is the only nation in history which has miraculously gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilisation" - Georges Clemenceau "Australia may be the only country in the world in which the term "Academic" is regularily used as a term of abuse" - Dame Leonie Kramer "No one can be as calculatedly rude as the British, which amazes Americans, who do not understand studied insult and can only offer abuse as a substitute." - Paul Gallico, US writer
8. ColziSalvaged from archive5 Oct 2006, 00:19
   "The great thing about Glasgow now is that if there is a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards" - Billy Connolly 8) heh heh he's a legend ! He has so many he could fill a book :lol:
9. SpleenSalvaged from archive5 Oct 2006, 18:34
   Loved his quotes on Ken Bigley
10. OG LocSalvaged from archive5 Oct 2006, 20:16
    Loved his quotes on Ken Bigley Ass opposed to that prick Boris Johnson, fuckin posh dickhead.

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